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Post by Polbo on Oct 29, 2018 23:03:24 GMT -6
A trip to the post office was a routine thing, really. Sometimes you just couldn't meet up with someone in person and needed to send things their way from afar. So, in theory, the postal system was a great solution for that! But in practice, well... "You're holding up the line, dude," Polbo dully said to the guy in front of her, who seemed half dazed as he stared up at the many posters that adorned the walls that described all manner of functions the office had to offer. They were great and all, but the place was already running at snail speeds, and the last thing Polbo needed was some bozo making her wait even longer. But he barely even noticed her. At least, he didn't seem to notice her. "Uh, buddy, hello?" Polbo urged, reaching up her hand in front of his face and snapping her fingers a few times.
That worked better, as the man turned and glanced down at the pink haired woman. He had a strange, dead sort of look in his eyes, though, prompting Polbo to furrow her brows back at him. Now that she looked closely, he had a strange sort of aura to him. It reminded her of that one lady she'd met at the bar a while back, the ghost - wait, this guy was a ghost! "Whoa, what's a ghost doing at the post office?" Polbo asked, now with more genuine curiosity than annoyance. The ethereal figure turned to fully face Polbo, and slowly opened his mouth. The Earthling tilted her head expectantly at what he was about to say. Would he spew some ancient wisdom, or give off his harrowing tale of how he'd returned from the depths of Hell? The ghost finally spoke after leaving Polbo in her brief moment of anticipation.
"LEEROOOOOOOY JEEENKIIIIINS!"
"...What?" Before the Earthling really even had a chance to properly process the absolute trash that had just spewed from the dead guy's mouth, all sorts of different forms suddenly began flying throughout the post office, various ghosts popping in and out of the walls and freaking out most of the other regular humans were in attendance at the office. Each of them was shouting something, but Polbo could only make out a few of the distinct lines: "Shut up and take my money!" "One does not simply walk into Baodor!" "Trolololo!" The Earthling darted across the office and managed to find cover underneath one of the desks, crouching down and cupping her hands over her ears. "This is fucking agonizing!" she shouted over the whirlpool of noises the ghastly forms were emitting. What did these strange phrases mean? Why were the ghosts here? Who could stop this madness?
TAGS: Tysco Zautt | Chime | Lunatus
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Post by Tysco Zautt on Oct 30, 2018 9:05:41 GMT -6
|| Tysco’s PL: 8,000 || PL Suppressed to 333 [UT1] Secret Identity is in effect ||
Even the heroes of this universe had other more mundane things to be doing. This was especially true of heroes that had secret identities and alter egos associated with their particular brand of ‘hero-ing’. It was the same for one guy that fit those criteria; Tysco. Recently, he had been visiting extended family in North City and ordered something to be delivered to the address in North City as well, but unfortunately nobody was at home so the package was sent back to the post office and a note instructing Tysco to come pick it up within a week at his leisure was left behind instead.
To that end, Tysco casually meandered on over to the nearby post office whistling along the way. Although, something felt weirdly off to him as he approached, as if it was ever so slightly colder around this city block. He stopped in his tracks for a short moment, and blinked a few times. ‘That was weird.’ Tysco knew full well about the existence of ghosts, and was even friends with a few, but that feeling from moments was something else. Ancient, borderline eldritch in aura… Shaking his head to be rid of the bizarre thoughts, Tysco finally made his way into the post office.
As expected, basically nobody really wanted to be here, almost everyone looked bored and annoyed— even the workers. Tysco had no clue what he was so suddenly worried about, everything seemed completely normal.
Until the booming voice near enough shook the whole building. Tysco recognized that phrase— it was a really old internet thing, and some disheveled looking guy was the source of it… No, not just disheveled. Dead. ‘Oh woah, its a ghost-!’ Moments after that realization, tonnes of spirits started pouring in from every which way. ‘-s. Ghosts. Plural. Oookay.’ Tysco was less afraid and more flabbergasted at the sight of this unconventional haunting, if one could even really call it that.
People freaked out and tried to hide themselves as the ghosts continued to regurgitate bizarre quotes. “We gotta find the computer room!” “We’re going to caaaaandy mouuuuntaiinnn~” “How do I shot web?” Were among the most audible as three spirits flew near Tysco while he ducked and moved off to the side. “Aaallrighty theeeeen, seems I’m gonna be the first one to ask; what the doodle-doo is even happening here?! This seriously isn’t your typical haunting, I’ll tell you that!” Now this was more like it, of course there was something wrong out here, it seems that the bizarre and truly outlandish feeling from earlier was a prelude to this nonsense. “Can’t sleep. Clown will eat me.” “Spah sappin mah sentry!” Two more undead wisps fluttered along the ground and up a nearby potted plant. Tysco visibly and audibly cringed. ‘How the hell am I gonna deal with this?’ He thought, almost bumping into a lady with pink hair that crouched down and cupped her ears. With a click of his fingers, Tysco conjured a pair of earmuffs. “Hey, here! Take these. At least it’ll dampen this ridiculous noise.”
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Post by Karon on Oct 31, 2018 23:12:04 GMT -6
Karon's PL: 4,000
Karon was, simply put, exhausted. Something strange had happened on Earth several days ago, some shift in cosmic forces that the ogre couldn't be bothered to learn the details of. The important part was, it was causing all manner of supernatural nonsense to come out of the woodwork, including ghosts. It was just Karon's luck that this had to happen while he was on duty in the mortal world, and so the ghost hunter had gotten maybe one full night of sleep over the past three days combined. He was running on fumes, but he still had work to do, so on he went.
His next stop was somewhere down this street, but that was as far as his lead had gotten him. Without any means to sense the spirit's energy (which he should really look into, he kept reminding himself), he had only his eyes and ears to rely on. Luckily, it didn't take long before he found his destination. A group of humans ran, screaming, from the post office, chased by a ghostly wisp taunting, "You mad, bro?" repeatedly. Karon stared at the scene with dull eyes for a moment. Seriously? This was what he was dealing with? At least the spirit didn't seem to be hurting the humans, just scaring them. Some sort of poltergeist, then. He drew his sword from within his suit jacket and got to work doing what he did best: slicing up ghosts. The humans had long run off by the time he was done with it, almost as afraid of the sword-swinging blue man as they were of the ghost. But that was fine, they weren't part of his job, and there was still plenty more noise coming from the post office.
Sword still in hand, Karon pushed his way through the front doors to the chaos inside. "Alright, alright, settle down," he told the room, in general, not addressing anyone in particular, "I'm gonna kick the ass of every ghost in here, and then--" he interrupted himself with a yawn. Damn, he was tired, "--And then we can all go home." He crouched into a loose fighting stance, prompting one of the nearby specters to hold its hands up and say, "Ooh, look out, we got a badass over here!" in a mocking tone. Karon groaned. This was going to be a long night.
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Post by Polbo on Nov 2, 2018 12:40:14 GMT -6
The ghosts weren't exactly willing to shut up even after several minutes off spouting off their nonsense, and it was giving Polbo one of the most genuine headaches she'd had in years. She was pretty sure she heard one asking if he could 'haz a cheeseburger' when someone scooted up next to her underneath the shelter she'd taken. She glanced over at them suspiciously, fearing they might just be another ghost in disguise, but when noise blocking earmuffs were presented to her, she was more than happy to take and don them. "Oh, thanks!" she exclaimed as she grabbed them and lowered them over her ears gladly. They didn't exactly end up entirely nullifying the drivel all the ghosts were throwing out, but it did a better job at muffling them than her hands did. "I still don't understand how magic materialization works, but I sure am glad it does!"
She gave the guy with the weird hair a thumbs up before standing back up and clutching her package beneath her armpit. It looked like the people who worked at the post office hadn't yet fled, but they were cowering beneath their desks and not really doing their jobs. She couldn't send her package in this state! They had to get rid of these damn ghosts, first. Some blue dude with horns had already gotten on that! He quite deftly swung his sword around and sliced through the - wait, can you actually cut a ghost? Polbo was pretty sure they were all non physical and misty kind of guys. Then again, she had been able to spill a drink on one, so maybe that was only ghosts in the movies. The pink haired woman picked up one of the stanchions that stood nearby and unhooked the retractable belt that was attached to it, before swinging the thing around to smack right into the side of a ghost's head.
"Ermagerd!" it shouted as it was swatted away, though Polbo admittedly wasn't going to be doing much damage to these things, seeing as how she wasn't a super powered freak like just about everyone else she knew was. "Hey, magic guy!" she called out to the one who'd supplied her with the earmuffs. "Wanna magic yourself up a weapon or something so we can beat these ghosts away? I really need to send out a package before the post office closes!" She took another swing at a ghost, but missed, and he taunted her by shouting "Come at me, bro!"
TAGS: Tysco Zautt
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Post by Tysco Zautt on Nov 4, 2018 4:50:59 GMT -6
|| Tysco’s PL: 8,000 || PL Suppressed to 333 [UT1] Secret Identity is in effect ||
Tysco gave a glad thumbs up, happy to at least be of some help to the pink haired woman as he too rolled out from under the desk to get a better view of the obnoxious chaos beyond just using Ki sense. It wasn’t surprising to him that some people had a minimal understanding of magic materialization— or magic at all for that matter. “If it works it works, right? S’kinda like coding, I’d say-” Tysco’s motor mouth began to rev up, but he was very rudely interrupted by even more inane drivel, punctuated by a loud nasally; “LOTS’A SPAGHETTI!” To which Tysco’s frills reflexively twitched in annoyance. “Will you just knock it off!?” He swung a right hook right into the offending ghost’s jaw when it swooped by, sending it straight into the ground and bouncing along the floor with comical chew-toy squeaks each bounce.
Wiggling his right hand feigning that his strike was painful to him in some way, Tysco took notice of the next arrival— an Ogre! Damn, now that was one hell of a response time! ‘Either that guy is tracking this mausoleum’s worth of idiocy or he was in the right place at the right time, either way, this works!’
Ducking under yet another cluster of three diving spirits all blabbering the same phrase to each other over and over. “Cool story bro, cool story bro, cool story bro!” Tysco watched as the trio of spirits haphazardly sailed around, shoving a bunch of stuff off one of the employee’s desks, one of which was a lamp, that tragically shattered upon hitting the ground. The office worker hidden under that desk— a Moth-person Zoanthrope— glanced over and exclaimed in shock. “Aaa! My lamp! My brother gave me that as a gift!!” Upon hearing that, it was as if the three ghosts were stunned… Then Tysco realized something. What the Moth-person just said was really close to a more recent meme. ‘Wait, what was that about?’ Perhaps newer jokes were their weakness? Before Tysco could give it much thought, the pink haired lady called out to him; saying that he should conjure up a weapon. “Y-yeah, I guess that’ll help!”
With a click of his fingers, he created a spiked flail. “Wait, no.” It was too brutal of a weapon, and one that might cause more damage to things that weren’t the ghosts if misused. Clicking his fingers again, the weapon changed into a giant rod-like bludgeon with a set of ridged teeth at the end. “... No, no, no! I’m not unlocking a giant door or unlocking the truth of a mortal soul, I’m fighting ghosts!” He groaned in frustration, narrowly avoiding another low flying ghost that had mockingly transformed into awkwardly waddling penguin. “Oh, ha ha, you suck!” Tysco clicked his fingers once again, and his goofy weapon tuned into a portable back mounted vacuum cleaner! Apparently even his magic had a sense of humor. “For the love of—” Tysco was willing to give up on this entirely and just use something that was lying around; but then he saw that the ghosts immediately around him cowered in fear! “Ohhhh yeaaaah, its like that thing from Wraith Wranglers! This works!” He grinned happily at this realization. “So hey, you lot! Who would win? A bunch of dead memes…” Brandishing his ‘weapon’ Tysco’s grin became menacing. “Or one spicy boi?”
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Post by Karon on Nov 6, 2018 16:43:39 GMT -6
Karon's blade glowed a dull blue as he sliced through one ghost, and another, and then another, but the horde's numbers didn't seem to be dwindling. For every one he cut down, it felt as if two more appeared out of the woodwork, spouting their inane nonsense. It was getting irritating. He wound his way through the post office, jumping over piles of fallen mail and around fleeing customers, towards one of the few other people who seemed to be doing anything to fight back: a pink haired woman, human as far as he could tell, swinging some sort of post. Mostly ineffectually, but she had more guts than most of the mortals in this place, so he decided to stick with her. He took up his stance again with his back to her, and shouted over his shoulder, so she could hear him through her earmuffs, "I've got your back, Pink!" When she expressed her concern over needing to send her mail, however, the ogre was so taken aback that he nearly missed the next wailing ghost that flew his way, "Is that really what you're worried about right now?!" he sputtered at her.
The only other person in the post office fighting back was a white-haired boy, a magic-user, and decidedly not human, though what exactly he was, Karon couldn't tell. But he'd traveled back and forth between the realms long enough to tell when someone was a mortal, and when they were not, and there was something distinctly not about that boy. He conjured up weapon after weapon, causing one of the ghosts to exclaim "What are thooose?!", and franky, Karon was inclined to ask the same question. What was that, a vacuum cleaner? But before the ogre could say anything at all, a rumbling sounded from down the hall.
It was a low sound, slow and methodical, like an ancient war chant. It grew louder and more intense as it approached, and soon, the source came barreling marching around the corner. A horde of black and white ghosts, each rather small, but intimidating for their numbers. They approached, unrelenting, towards the main room of the post office, and threatened to overwhelm the trio in seconds. All the while, they continued to chant in haunting unison, "Badger badger badger badger..."
Karon swiveled around just as the group descended upon them, "Pink! Spicy! Look alive, you two!"
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Post by Polbo on Nov 9, 2018 14:09:52 GMT -6
"Of course it's what I'm worried about!" Polbo snapped back at the blue ogre, "This package is very important!" She then whacked another ghost, who promptly exclaimed, "That feel when some human with pink hair whacks you with a stanchion..." "That's not a relatable feeling at all!" Polbo shouted as she continued to swing away, mostly missing her mark, though. These ghosts were really fast! Panting her breaths, she glanced aside at the magical boy, who'd whipped up a... Vacuum cleaner? Well, if it was a magical vacuum cleaner, then maybe that'd work some kinds of wonders. And then, the distant rumbling began. Polbo didn't notice it at first, as she was busy trying to clonk one ghost in particular on the head who kept shouting something about 'peanut butter jelly time', though she stopped chasing after him when she felt the ground shaking. "What is that?" she asked the other two as she tightly gripped her weapon.
And then, the horde was upon them.
"MUSHROOM! MUSHROOM!"
Polbo flinched back as dozens of ghosts started to swarm them all, and though they were small, their numbers more than made up for it as she felt herself nearly being carried off of her feet. "Wagh!" she exclaimed as she nearly tripped and fell over, scrambling to get herself up safely onto one of the counters just in time to avoid being trampled over by the ghosts. Polbo jabbed down at the stampede with her weapon to try and fend them off, though the stanchion was promptly ripped from her hands and swept along down the raging stream of ghosts, until it sunk beneath the surface. "Well, shit," she muttered as she glanced around. The ghosts that were flying overhead were getting antsier too, practically screaming off the top of their heads by this point. Polbo sure was glad she had those headphones.
"Hey, whacking them isn't gonna work, here!" she shouted across the post office at the other two fighters, "There's wayyyy too many of them to cut them down one at a time! There's gotta be a better method, here!" If there was one, though, Polbo didn't know it. Maybe if she had time to think clearly she could come up with something, but the piercing cries of the ghosts were giving her a headache. As she was distracted shouting orders at the orders, she failed to notice a ghost with large lips get right behind her. "IMMA FIRIN MA LASER!" it shouted, and Polbo turned around just in time to get blasted off the table by an ethereal laser, and knocked into the sea of swarming ghosts below. "Someone help me...!" she cried out as she sunk below the surface, and her outstretched arm was all that remained visible above the swarm as it sunk deeper and deeper.
TAGS: Tysco Zautt
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